sad bird in snow: I have no idea. he was extremely wasted when he was telling me about this sad bird in snow: I told him that he should probably wait until he was sober to make decisions about... a lot of things.
Morning☆Glory: Maybe it was more an example of how far he still feels like he's behind, then... Morning☆Glory: First everyone's dating lots of people when he doesn't even know how to have a relationship, then he gets the hang of that and someone wants a foursome when he can't even handle a threesome... that kind of thing. Morning☆Glory: Though I know he still feels like he's disappointing people on that first one, too. Like me. He also talked to Raven about that. Morning☆Glory: I am worried about him forcing himself to do something just because he feels like he should.
sad bird in snow: I’m starting to have that worry for him, too... sad bird in snow: I mean I’m the worst example but at least sex is the one place I’m decent at having boundaries sad bird in snow: Sometimes your comfort zone is your comfort zone.
Morning☆Glory: He's a really good guy, and he wants to make people happy... Morning☆Glory: I can see him deciding that him being uncomfortable is an acceptable price for that, even if the people he's with don't want that for him. Morning☆Glory: Though, to be fair, it's hard... Sometimes you DO want to try something you're a little uncomfortable with, to push yourself and see if it's something you like once you get into it. Morning☆Glory: So sometimes the line there isn't really clear.
sad bird in snow: Maybe I should have Persephone talk to him... sad bird in snow: He’s pretty good at talking through that sort of thing and sometimes it helps to hear from someone who doesn’t have a stake in it
Morning☆Glory: That might be a good idea Morning☆Glory: I did try to talk to him a little, but I'm not sure he even really believes me that he's not disappointing me, so I'm probably the wrong person for it.
sad bird in snow: Mm, it’s probably a very delicate topic... sad bird in snow: But Persephone is embarrassed by practically nothing and also wouldn’t accidentally develop any feelings
Morning☆Glory: That sounds good then. I still don't know him very well, so I'll trust your judgment.
[...]
Morning☆Glory: Speaking of delicate topics, I did have one other thing I wanted to talk to you about. Morning☆Glory: Sort of on the subject of Nero and Raven, I guess
Morning☆Glory: Raven told me he'd been thinking about offering that I could join their family, the other day. Morning☆Glory: I don't really know what that means in practice, and I don't think he does either Morning☆Glory: But I said I'd like that, and he said he'd talk to Dante and Nero about it at least Morning☆Glory: I don't think he has yet... Morning☆Glory: Though Nero did tell me I could come back to their world with them, if I wanted
sad bird in snow: Oh, that's really nice... sad bird in snow: Honestly I can't see Nero being against it sad bird in snow: And that'd make us family, too, I suppose, since I'm marrying in
sad bird in snow: Honestly, my family from home was perhaps sad bird in snow: Not great at being a family sad bird in snow: So I've sort of been making it up as I go along with avante, but I think it's sort of... nice to have a family that you choose, where you have each others' backs and support each other sad bird in snow: It seems like that's also just the default where Cardinal comes from, so maybe it might be worth talking to them
Morning☆Glory: Yeah, I talked to Cardinal about b'ashes and stuff ages ago. Morning☆Glory: That's always been something I want, and I do really like and get along with all of them, and we've done a lot for each other, so I think it would make me really happy, but... Morning☆Glory: I don't know, it seems weirder when they're actual family. Like I'd be intruding. Morning☆Glory: I have no idea at all how to be part of a family. Nero talked to me some about how some of it is seeing the family resemblance in each other, and that sort of thing, which I'm obviously not part of... And if something goes weird, I wouldn't want them to feel obligated to me.
Morning☆Glory: I also wouldn't be helping the incest situation. Clearly.
sad bird in snow: Well, it's sort of... sad bird in snow: well, I suppose it's also like marrying in, in a way. Where it's not as if you were raised together? sad bird in snow: and also I guess we're just sort of barreling through that issue. Apparently.
sad bird in snow: I don't think... there's any real one way to be part of a family sad bird in snow: And it seems like you get along really well with all of them, so it's not like you're intruding sad bird in snow: Also they're all already weird. You cannot make it worse.
Morning☆Glory: They are, that's true. Morning☆Glory: And I guess it's kind of like that. I'm not marrying anyone, though. Would it be like Raven adopting me? Everyone generally adopting me...? Morning☆Glory: Maybe I should ask Cardinal how the joining part usually works for them...
sad bird in snow: It does seem kind of like everyone collectively adopting you... sad bird in snow: But I think it's true that Cardinal would be a good resource sad bird in snow: Also, I'm really happy for you
Morning☆Glory: Thank you Morning☆Glory: I'm not sure I can totally be happy about it yet.. Morning☆Glory: I guess it's so much what I want that it seems too good to be true until it actually happens. Morning☆Glory: If I even think about it too hard I get scared I'm going to mess it up somehow. Morning☆Glory: Though I am happy that Raven thinks enough of me to even suggest it.
sad bird in snow: I'm not sure there's a way you can mess it up... sad bird in snow: I mean, I was worried about telling Nero I was interested in him because I was worried it would ruin the family he wanted, but instead it was nice sad bird in snow: I guess the idea of family is... even if you argue, it's a bond that runs deeper than nearly all disagreements sad bird in snow: My brother hated me, but he was still my brother, and I still cared about him
sad bird in snow: Maybe then... well, just spending more type together and finding ways to rely on each other sad bird in snow: That'll start to build it, won't it? sad bird in snow: It seems like you already have that relationship with Raven for sure
Morning☆Glory: Yeah. Morning☆Glory: Raven for sure. Morning☆Glory: Maybe I'm just afraid that if I push on the family thing too fast, it'll be too weird for the others, and it won't be the same.
sad bird in snow: Well, on the other hand, I don't think avante would have gotten into the family sort of feeling if Nero hadn't pushed for it in the first place?
Morning☆Glory: That's a good point, I guess. Morning☆Glory: And Nero didn't even know about the family thing, but he was still telling me that he didn't know what any of them would do without me there to make them be a little less dumb about things. Morning☆Glory: So maybe you could argue that I'd help them out...
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
softlyfalling) wrote2019-02-12 07:23 pm
Re: Day 254 morning
sad bird in snow: I told him that he should probably wait until he was sober to make decisions about... a lot of things.
Re: Day 254 morning
Morning☆Glory: First everyone's dating lots of people when he doesn't even know how to have a relationship, then he gets the hang of that and someone wants a foursome when he can't even handle a threesome... that kind of thing.
Morning☆Glory: Though I know he still feels like he's disappointing people on that first one, too. Like me. He also talked to Raven about that.
Morning☆Glory: I am worried about him forcing himself to do something just because he feels like he should.
Re: Day 254 morning
sad bird in snow: I mean I’m the worst example but at least sex is the one place I’m decent at having boundaries
sad bird in snow: Sometimes your comfort zone is your comfort zone.
Re: Day 254 morning
Morning☆Glory: I can see him deciding that him being uncomfortable is an acceptable price for that, even if the people he's with don't want that for him.
Morning☆Glory: Though, to be fair, it's hard... Sometimes you DO want to try something you're a little uncomfortable with, to push yourself and see if it's something you like once you get into it.
Morning☆Glory: So sometimes the line there isn't really clear.
Re: Day 254 morning
sad bird in snow: He’s pretty good at talking through that sort of thing and sometimes it helps to hear from someone who doesn’t have a stake in it
Re: Day 254 morning
Morning☆Glory: I did try to talk to him a little, but I'm not sure he even really believes me that he's not disappointing me, so I'm probably the wrong person for it.
Re: Day 254 morning
sad bird in snow: But Persephone is embarrassed by practically nothing and also wouldn’t accidentally develop any feelings
Re: Day 254 morning
[...]
Morning☆Glory: Speaking of delicate topics, I did have one other thing I wanted to talk to you about.
Morning☆Glory: Sort of on the subject of Nero and Raven, I guess
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Morning☆Glory: Raven told me he'd been thinking about offering that I could join their family, the other day.
Morning☆Glory: I don't really know what that means in practice, and I don't think he does either
Morning☆Glory: But I said I'd like that, and he said he'd talk to Dante and Nero about it at least
Morning☆Glory: I don't think he has yet...
Morning☆Glory: Though Nero did tell me I could come back to their world with them, if I wanted
Re: Day 254 morning
sad bird in snow: Honestly I can't see Nero being against it
sad bird in snow: And that'd make us family, too, I suppose, since I'm marrying in
sad bird in snow: Honestly, my family from home was perhaps
sad bird in snow: Not great at being a family
sad bird in snow: So I've sort of been making it up as I go along with avante, but I think it's sort of... nice to have a family that you choose, where you have each others' backs and support each other
sad bird in snow: It seems like that's also just the default where Cardinal comes from, so maybe it might be worth talking to them
Re: Day 254 morning
Morning☆Glory: That's always been something I want, and I do really like and get along with all of them, and we've done a lot for each other, so I think it would make me really happy, but...
Morning☆Glory: I don't know, it seems weirder when they're actual family. Like I'd be intruding.
Morning☆Glory: I have no idea at all how to be part of a family. Nero talked to me some about how some of it is seeing the family resemblance in each other, and that sort of thing, which I'm obviously not part of... And if something goes weird, I wouldn't want them to feel obligated to me.
Morning☆Glory: I also wouldn't be helping the incest situation. Clearly.
Re: Day 254 morning
sad bird in snow: well, I suppose it's also like marrying in, in a way. Where it's not as if you were raised together?
sad bird in snow: and also I guess we're just sort of barreling through that issue. Apparently.
sad bird in snow: I don't think... there's any real one way to be part of a family
sad bird in snow: And it seems like you get along really well with all of them, so it's not like you're intruding
sad bird in snow: Also they're all already weird. You cannot make it worse.
Re: Day 254 morning
Morning☆Glory: And I guess it's kind of like that. I'm not marrying anyone, though. Would it be like Raven adopting me? Everyone generally adopting me...?
Morning☆Glory: Maybe I should ask Cardinal how the joining part usually works for them...
Re: Day 254 morning
sad bird in snow: But I think it's true that Cardinal would be a good resource
sad bird in snow: Also, I'm really happy for you
Re: Day 254 morning
Morning☆Glory: I'm not sure I can totally be happy about it yet..
Morning☆Glory: I guess it's so much what I want that it seems too good to be true until it actually happens.
Morning☆Glory: If I even think about it too hard I get scared I'm going to mess it up somehow.
Morning☆Glory: Though I am happy that Raven thinks enough of me to even suggest it.
Re: Day 254 morning
sad bird in snow: I mean, I was worried about telling Nero I was interested in him because I was worried it would ruin the family he wanted, but instead it was nice
sad bird in snow: I guess the idea of family is... even if you argue, it's a bond that runs deeper than nearly all disagreements
sad bird in snow: My brother hated me, but he was still my brother, and I still cared about him
Re: Day 254 morning
Morning☆Glory: That's the part I'm worried about
Re: Day 254 morning
sad bird in snow: That'll start to build it, won't it?
sad bird in snow: It seems like you already have that relationship with Raven for sure
Re: Day 254 morning
Morning☆Glory: Raven for sure.
Morning☆Glory: Maybe I'm just afraid that if I push on the family thing too fast, it'll be too weird for the others, and it won't be the same.
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Morning☆Glory: And Nero didn't even know about the family thing, but he was still telling me that he didn't know what any of them would do without me there to make them be a little less dumb about things.
Morning☆Glory: So maybe you could argue that I'd help them out...
Re: Day 254 morning
sad bird in snow: While still being able to speak the same language
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning