Morning☆Glory: That's a good point, I guess. Morning☆Glory: And Nero didn't even know about the family thing, but he was still telling me that he didn't know what any of them would do without me there to make them be a little less dumb about things. Morning☆Glory: So maybe you could argue that I'd help them out...
sad bird in snow: I like the idea of family being family just because they are and not needing to feel useful sad bird in snow: But it is nice to have a niche, in a way.
sad bird in snow: I mean, everyone I call family here isn't actually family sad bird in snow: except I guess I am literally marrying Nero now. sad bird in snow: But if someone's of the mind to be broader about their definition of family, then it shouldn't matter.
Morning☆Glory: I guess that's the part I have trouble getting my head around. Morning☆Glory: How do you decide when someone's family or not? Morning☆Glory: Is it just... wanting them to be? Morning☆Glory: What if they don't want me to?
sad bird in snow: I have no idea when you decide sad bird in snow: some days you just wake up and you have three cute little brothers, none of whom are on the same unit or look remotely like each other but you'd kill for all of them?
sad bird in snow: All right maybe that's just me sad bird in snow: But, I don't know, sometimes you spend enough time around people and you realize your relationships are just taking on that tone sad bird in snow: Or sometimes you're Nero and you decide This Is Just Your Family Now and doggedly make it work until it does sad bird in snow: Or you get adopted, and then it's really obvious.
sad bird in snow: So good thing that seems like what Raven's doing sad bird in snow: Also admittedly sad bird in snow: when you've had sex involving at least two of them sad bird in snow: that's probably a pretty strong indicator that they like you?
sad bird in snow: ...all right that's fair sad bird in snow: That was maybe a little unnecessarily teasing. sad bird in snow: But it's a weird family, so the normal indicators are probably... off. sad bird in snow: Anyway if I get a vote by marriage I'll vote for you
sad bird in snow: ........though I guess I too am not solving this problem of sexual attraction versus familial feelings, sorry.
Morning☆Glory: I appreciate your support. Morning☆Glory: Which sounds a little sarcastic, but I really do. You're definitely part of it too, and the fact that you want me there too does mean a lot. Morning☆Glory: And it's fine, really Morning☆Glory: It's not like I necessarily MIND being sexually attracted to the entire family, it just does seem a bit weird. Morning☆Glory: Though I guess it's not like those things are always totally different... when you're talking about marriage and starting a family like that, that does usually involve sex? Morning☆Glory: So if you imagine that sort of thing expanded beyond the normal man and woman having kids, maybe it kind of makes sense a little...? Morning☆Glory: That kind of makes it sound like I'm marrying all of them, though, which doesn't seem right either.
sad bird in snow: I guess it's just... a lot of different ways of forming close bonds within a group of people, some of whom are related by blood and some of whom aren't sad bird in snow: And sometimes, I guess, that does definitely involve sex sad bird in snow: so I think there's probably something to that?
Morning☆Glory: Yeah. Morning☆Glory: I guess the thing is... I don't have much experience with ANY kind of close bonds with people. Morning☆Glory: I've tried to have them. And I HAVE messed it up a bunch of times. Dated A when we should have just been friends, wanted Taisho to be family when other people didn't... Morning☆Glory: So it's really hard for me to imagine just... waking up and being sure about it. Morning☆Glory: I care about them a lot. With all of them I was surprised how quickly and easily I felt like we understood each other, even though it was in different ways with everyone. It's comfortable, and it makes me happy. Morning☆Glory: So... I do feel like it's right, I think. That they're my family. Morning☆Glory: But I can't help thinking that maybe I'm wrong. Because when have I ever been right about that kind of thing? Morning☆Glory: And it being something so out of the ordinary doesn't help, because it's not like I have anything to look at and think... yeah, it's like that. Morning☆Glory: It's fine with me if it's something weird. I decided a while ago I wasn't going to be normal. Morning☆Glory: But I don't know how to stop being scared it's not actually anything.
sad bird in snow: I'm not sure most of them know what a family is supposed to feel like, either sad bird in snow: But I think that feeling you have is one to hold onto sad bird in snow: Because, I think that kind of comfortable understanding—that's the right instinct? sad bird in snow: It'll probably be hard for a while still, but you've got your supporters to lean on in the meantime.
Morning☆Glory: Yeah. Thank you. Morning☆Glory: And I think what you said about Nero pushing avante for it did mean something to me too, even if I can't be Nero. Morning☆Glory: Because it's true that the comfortable understanding is there, and that's mutual. I don't actually have any doubts about that part. Morning☆Glory: So, maybe I should think of it more like... pushing for putting a name to that, and for taking it a little bit further. The same way I might push them in any other kind of feelings direction when they're being dumb.
Morning☆Glory: I don't know about DEFINITELY Morning☆Glory: but I do feel a lot better talking it through Morning☆Glory: So thank you again. Morning☆Glory: At the very least I should probably talk to the rest of them about it... or get Raven to soon. I don't think being worried they're going to think the whole idea is ridiculous is helping me much.
sad bird in snow: Approaching it with him as a team would probably be pretty good, too sad bird in snow: I hope it goes well! I suppose there's no gods to pray to here, but I don't think you'll need a blessing, anyway.
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softlyfalling) wrote2019-02-12 07:23 pm
Re: Day 254 morning
Morning☆Glory: And Nero didn't even know about the family thing, but he was still telling me that he didn't know what any of them would do without me there to make them be a little less dumb about things.
Morning☆Glory: So maybe you could argue that I'd help them out...
Re: Day 254 morning
sad bird in snow: While still being able to speak the same language
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
Morning☆Glory: It is something good about being with them, either way.
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sad bird in snow: But it is nice to have a niche, in a way.
Re: Day 254 morning
Morning☆Glory: But I'm NOT actually family, so...
Re: Day 254 morning
sad bird in snow: except I guess I am literally marrying Nero now.
sad bird in snow: But if someone's of the mind to be broader about their definition of family, then it shouldn't matter.
Re: Day 254 morning
Morning☆Glory: How do you decide when someone's family or not?
Morning☆Glory: Is it just... wanting them to be?
Morning☆Glory: What if they don't want me to?
Re: Day 254 morning
sad bird in snow: some days you just wake up and you have three cute little brothers, none of whom are on the same unit or look remotely like each other but you'd kill for all of them?
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
sad bird in snow: But, I don't know, sometimes you spend enough time around people and you realize your relationships are just taking on that tone
sad bird in snow: Or sometimes you're Nero and you decide This Is Just Your Family Now and doggedly make it work until it does
sad bird in snow: Or you get adopted, and then it's really obvious.
Re: Day 254 morning
Re: Day 254 morning
sad bird in snow: Also admittedly
sad bird in snow: when you've had sex involving at least two of them
sad bird in snow: that's probably a pretty strong indicator that they like you?
Re: Day 254 morning
Morning☆Glory: GENERALLY that doesn't indicate like in a family way, though, I'm pretty sure.
Morning☆Glory: Also, you don't need to say "at least"
Re: Day 254 morning
sad bird in snow: That was maybe a little unnecessarily teasing.
sad bird in snow: But it's a weird family, so the normal indicators are probably... off.
sad bird in snow: Anyway if I get a vote by marriage I'll vote for you
sad bird in snow: ........though I guess I too am not solving this problem of sexual attraction versus familial feelings, sorry.
Re: Day 254 morning
Morning☆Glory: Which sounds a little sarcastic, but I really do. You're definitely part of it too, and the fact that you want me there too does mean a lot.
Morning☆Glory: And it's fine, really
Morning☆Glory: It's not like I necessarily MIND being sexually attracted to the entire family, it just does seem a bit weird.
Morning☆Glory: Though I guess it's not like those things are always totally different... when you're talking about marriage and starting a family like that, that does usually involve sex?
Morning☆Glory: So if you imagine that sort of thing expanded beyond the normal man and woman having kids, maybe it kind of makes sense a little...?
Morning☆Glory: That kind of makes it sound like I'm marrying all of them, though, which doesn't seem right either.
Re: Day 254 morning
sad bird in snow: And sometimes, I guess, that does definitely involve sex
sad bird in snow: so I think there's probably something to that?
Re: Day 254 morning
Morning☆Glory: I guess the thing is... I don't have much experience with ANY kind of close bonds with people.
Morning☆Glory: I've tried to have them. And I HAVE messed it up a bunch of times. Dated A when we should have just been friends, wanted Taisho to be family when other people didn't...
Morning☆Glory: So it's really hard for me to imagine just... waking up and being sure about it.
Morning☆Glory: I care about them a lot. With all of them I was surprised how quickly and easily I felt like we understood each other, even though it was in different ways with everyone. It's comfortable, and it makes me happy.
Morning☆Glory: So... I do feel like it's right, I think. That they're my family.
Morning☆Glory: But I can't help thinking that maybe I'm wrong. Because when have I ever been right about that kind of thing?
Morning☆Glory: And it being something so out of the ordinary doesn't help, because it's not like I have anything to look at and think... yeah, it's like that.
Morning☆Glory: It's fine with me if it's something weird. I decided a while ago I wasn't going to be normal.
Morning☆Glory: But I don't know how to stop being scared it's not actually anything.
Re: Day 254 morning
sad bird in snow: But I think that feeling you have is one to hold onto
sad bird in snow: Because, I think that kind of comfortable understanding—that's the right instinct?
sad bird in snow: It'll probably be hard for a while still, but you've got your supporters to lean on in the meantime.
Re: Day 254 morning
Morning☆Glory: And I think what you said about Nero pushing avante for it did mean something to me too, even if I can't be Nero.
Morning☆Glory: Because it's true that the comfortable understanding is there, and that's mutual. I don't actually have any doubts about that part.
Morning☆Glory: So, maybe I should think of it more like... pushing for putting a name to that, and for taking it a little bit further. The same way I might push them in any other kind of feelings direction when they're being dumb.
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sad bird in snow: You've definitely got this!
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Morning☆Glory: but I do feel a lot better talking it through
Morning☆Glory: So thank you again.
Morning☆Glory: At the very least I should probably talk to the rest of them about it... or get Raven to soon. I don't think being worried they're going to think the whole idea is ridiculous is helping me much.
Re: Day 254 morning
sad bird in snow: I hope it goes well! I suppose there's no gods to pray to here, but I don't think you'll need a blessing, anyway.
Re: Day 254 morning
Morning☆Glory: Thank you, though.